Bees Mouth - May 2017

May 15th

OMG! Still 24 more sleeps to go til everyone finally gets to vote, then collapse in a fevered heap, their busy little brains worn out with the effort of sustaining their opinions, their Facebook pages laden down with big squishy heaps of suppurating ill-tempered sniping masquerading as political engagement, their ears ringing with the words ‘strong and stable’ or ‘policies and principles’ echoing in shrill doomy voices… give yerself a break, get down to JAZZ NIGHT AT THE BEE’S MOUTH where we have a warm welcome awaiting you no matter what your convictions, as long as they’re not criminal, thanks to the superhuman all-party skills of Luke ‘Mr Dynamite’ Rattenbury’ (gtr) and Loz ‘The Big Noise from The Big Smoke’ Thomas (drms) plus me on the ol’ dog house, the ever-radiant Bee’s team, and the usual cast of characters swept in out of the night’s turbulent mystery to give their personalities some exercise as we lay down a magic carpet of swing-to-funk-to-bop to take you away from all the bad vibes and into a world of entrancing possibilities … like you’re a footballer on an open-top bus parading through the town, in that magic moment after the promotion but before all the scandals start, with the wind in your funkily coiffeured hair, the sun on your artfully stubbled face, cheers of adoration ringing in your shell-like ears…. leave your ransom-ware riddled devices behind, stop shouting at the pollsters or trying to undermine the integrity of the poor old BBC, wipe your mind forever clean of the image of politicians eating fast food in an effort to appear normal, leave off feeling guiltily, bizarrely nostalgic for Phil 'Prince' Mountbatten's unique contributions to public life, come and join us, let the music take you higher, higher, higher.

May 8th

Are you surrounded by a swarm of overheated online election hoo-ha, ubiquitous and unavoidable as the massed ranks of ukelele players, slam poets and fire jugglers now advancing upon us under cover of the Fringe Festival? Haunted by the image of Ms Le Pen doing her weird Nazi-disco dance, rolling her eyes at you and sticking her tongue out between her fingers like a terrifying lunatic at a provincial midweek 90s revival night who won’t take no for an answer? JAZZ NIGHT AT THE BEE’S MOUTH will be your sanctuary, your refuge and your psychic regenerator, as we’ve got the old skool original G team of Luke ‘Mr Magic’ Rattenbury (gtr) and Loz ‘A Huge Ever Growing Pulsating Brain That Rule From The Centre Of The Ultraworld’ Thomas (drms) plus me on bass, laying down some old standards, blues, bebop and grooves while the radiant celestial beings known in this earthly dimension as the Bee’s Team wait in the scented shadows behind the well-stocked bar, ready to hand over refreshing libations of the finest liquors known to man… don’t spend the evening cowering in front of your FB feed, flinching before the shrill chatter of ‘strong and stable’ assaulting your consciousness like a flock of angry nanobot cockatoos, or watching Mr Corbyn looking cross and puzzled, or realising that you’ve forgotten all about what Trump and his busy little orange hands may have been up to in the meantime..Spring is in the air, the voice of the cuckoo is heard once again across the land, let the storm of intransigent political emnity rage away in it’s own little online teacup for the rest of the evening and get on the good foot , grab your axe down off the shelf and celebrate good times, come on…